Dear Abby! How can I help my grown daughter stop making the same mistakes about the men she dates?

DEAR ABBY! Is there anything I can do to help my 55-year-old daughter, who has just entered another, surely doomed relationship? She quickly begins cohabiting with these men, usually in less than two months. Then my daughter reinvents herself to appeal to HIS ideal. Each time the relationship ended, it cost her dearly and negatively affected her now grown children.

Despite all this, my daughter remained working, although four years is a long time in one position. I fear that the latest move will limit her employment opportunities once the trend toward working from home softens. Is it the same as dealing with a drug addict or alcoholic who has to realize on their own that they need to get help? This rollercoaster got me too. — MOM ON THE SIDE

DEAR MOTHER: You can talk until you’re blue in the face—and I’m guessing you’ve tried more than once—to make your middle-aged daughter realize that what she’s been doing isn’t right for her. She is not a “junkie”, but she is desperate to find a partner.

When your daughter finally realizes that she doesn’t have to twist herself into a pretzel to please a man, and that she is fine just the way she is—a successful mother, self-sufficient, and worthy in her own right—she may not only feel better about herself, but also she will be lucky to find a partner.

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Abby’s Road was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or at PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, California 90069. Copyright 2024, Andrews, McMeel Syndication.