Dear Abby! Bitter feelings toward a bad teacher persist decades later

DEAR ABBY: My elementary school teacher recently passed away. I haven’t seen her in over 20 years because of the way she made me feel. I remember her as a manipulator and had a negative attitude towards the less fortunate. Since I was not from a rich or famous family, I was subjected to humiliation, fear and intimidation. I remember her as money-minded, judgmental and sympathetic to the privileged, whom she thought were smarter.

Being dyslexic made it difficult for me to read and interpret words, so she made me stand for hours and stare shame in the face. Now that she’s dead, I realize that I never had the opportunity to tell her how wrong she was, and that in high school my negative attitude toward education changed for the better because I had great teachers and great classmates.

The people who praise her now are the same people she promoted and supported. I just wanted to speak out because so many people have been mistreated. — SCARRED IN TEXAS

DEAR SCARRED! I think you expressed your feelings very well. Maybe that teacher didn’t realize she had a student with a learning disability and punished you, when instead she should have realized you needed extra help to succeed. Consider her inability to handle it properly as HER learning disability and try to forgive her. Despite her, you came out very good, and it’s time to get her out of your head.

***

Abby’s Road was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.