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A father says he’s tired of feeling like a “bad cop” when he argues with his wife

A father says he’s tired of feeling like a “bad cop” when he argues with his wife

One dad dealing with a clingy 5-year-old daughter who’s jealous of her newborn baby sister says he’s not getting the parenting support he wants from his wife.

In a recent post on Reddit, “I——?» on the forum, the 29-year-old dad told other Redditors about the situation involving his 5-year-old daughter Alice and her newborn sister.

The father explained that he has three children: Alisa, the eldest, a 3-year-old son, and a 2-week-old daughter. He described Alice as a “daddy’s girl” who was once jealous of her brother when he was born. Fortunately, this has passed, but now the problem has returned in light of the arrival of a new family member.

“Ever since the baby came home, Alice has been attached to me—literally and figuratively,” Dad explained. “Monsters always appear in her closet when I babysit, monsters that only I can ‘get rid of’ – I must be a wizard.”

But Alice’s new need does not end there. Dad goes on to say that she wants to be carried around and that she won’t go to sleep unless he rocks her in the chair. Not only that, but now she is also becoming a bit more demanding. She even throws what he calls “carry me” tantrums.

“When she woke up one morning and saw me giving the baby a bottle, she got upset and tried to push herself onto my lap,” the dad said.

Needing help, he turned to his wife for support, telling her he didn’t want to be the “bad cop” every time Alice needed help. He asked for backup, asking her to just step in with verbal warnings, or maybe help remove Alice when she gets so clingy.

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A father takes care of his daughter.

monzenmachi/Getty


“She got mad at me for it,” he shared. “She said she already has a lot on her plate and doesn’t think she needs to interfere with it.”

Mom also told him “not to make a fuss” and that Alice was going through a phase that would eventually pass.

“I guess she thinks I should handle it myself now,” he added. “AITA for asking my wife to support me in raising children?”

Many Reddit users chimed in — and quite a few sided with mom.

“While I understand what you’re saying, I really don’t think giving your wife a verbal warning is going to help this situation,” the Redditor commented. “She’s daddy’s daughter, daddy should clearly define his boundaries. What are the consequences when she tries to push herself onto your lap or other unwanted behavior? She is certainly old enough to use some method of discipline.”

“Your wife has a two week old newborn it’s not the same as you having a newborn,” said another. “Newborns are very dependent on their mothers. Your wife carries 90% of the weight with the newborn. I agree with her. She has too much on her plate. Deal with it yourself.”

“Your wife just had a baby and like you said she’s daddy’s girl so she’ll listen to you,” commented another. “Yeah, sometimes you have to be the bad guy, it’s not always your wife. Like you said last time it went well and that’s to be expected because it’s another baby and big changes, she’s just a baby herself, it’s hard for her to understand.”